Tution My Confusion

When my daughter entered 11th grade and chose science, the pressure was immense—not on her, but on me. How would she manage these difficult subjects? I felt it was my responsibility to find the best tuition for physics, chemistry, and math.

Most of my daughter’s classmates attended expensive coaching for each subject. I explored various options and found what was considered the best, but the fees were over 2 lakhs, with 50 students in a class. It felt like I was buying gold and diamonds.

People often say a child’s education is worth more than gold, it is also true that everyone cannot afford it. I eventually enrolled her in a more reasonably priced tuition.

A month later, I noticed she wasn’t attending her Tuition classes. The teachers complained, and I began to wonder how to motivate a teenager. Despite my constant reminders, she ignored them. When nothing worked, I resorted to emotional appeal – “I worked so hard to arrange tuition money and begged teachers for a discount. Now you’re wasting both the money and my efforts.”

She replied, “They’re not good enough. I can learn better on my own. It’s quite easy.”

I was frustrated, but I saw her studying independently and was sincere. She turned to free YouTube coaching channels when she needed help. In her finals, she not only surprised me but also, she self. She scored more than my expectations.

I asked, “How did that happen?”

She said, “You taught me until 7th grade. That gave me the foundation to handle the difficult stuff myself.”

A year later, when Vrinda entered 12th grade, she asked me for tuition again.

I said it confidently, “Like last year, you can do it all by yourself.”

She insisted, “11th was easy. 12th is different and tougher. I need coaching.”

But I was confident this time that she could manage without tuition. I made an excuse, saying, “I don’t have money and won’t borrow from anyone.”

A month later, she struggled with the first few chemistry chapters and started crying, saying, “I can’t understand anything. It’s too hard.”

After venting her frustration for two hours, she realized she had no other choice. Though I felt weak and considered arranging tuition but decided to wait for a few days. Fortunately, she didn’t bring up the topic again and focused on her studies.

Six months later, she scored the highest in chemistry.

She admitted, “It was very difficult at first, and I thought coaching would give me immediate relief, a moral support at the time of need when I panic.  But when I tried myself, I got it. Now, I feel confident and proud.”

Her words made me reflect on our earlier years. Despite my poor academic background, I taught Vrinda until middle school. At first, I had to learn the subjects myself, especially math. Many times, it was challenging. After spending an hour on a single math concept with Vrinda, she would say, “I don’t understand anything.”

I took it as a challenge. If she couldn’t understand, perhaps I didn’t grasp it well enough. I worked on it for two hours and always found a better, often funny, way to explain it to her.

She was too young to acknowledge it then, but I felt immense satisfaction knowing I gave her a strong foundation. It is not about being a subject expert. It is about being willing to learn alongside your child.